I just finished watching a movie that I have watched before, "LATTER-DAYS". It is about a gay mormon missionary.
For many years I have been far away and over come so much of my past, but there are times when I sit in amazement to think I actually survived my own mormon mission from 1966 to 1968. I survived a relationship with a mormon bishop's wife who was beautiful but 25 years older than me. To think I survived 7 USO tours during the 70's and regardless of close encounters with near death accidents from South East Asia to Iceland, I survived!
Two times in my life I tried and sincerely meant to kill myself. One time with a bottle of Valium and a fifth of Vodka. Another time refusing to take the antibiotic I needed for a staff infection.
When I think about it for even a few moments I am humbled to think that every human being's existence in a physical body is a miracle. The odds against a person living past the first few months of their birth is quite astounding. All the INVISIBLE DEMONS one cannot see create such near death possibilities.
Invisible VIRUSES, unstable genetic codes, unknown accidents and risks that are in our pathway every step of the way. Dysfunctional families to abusive teachers, evil religious leaders and politicians. It is a miracle and enlightening to think I have survived all 60 years of my life.
Are there guardian angels? Some refer to karmic justice? Is the life we live pre-destine and we really have no say in the outcome? Does the law of attraction begin at birth or after we mature? I've watched some of my friends die in agony, some die peacefully and others die so quickly I'm not sure they knew just how fast it happened... I guess the main thing is we that survive years after the separation with certain people we love or that have loved us.
I once had a person tell me they had been in love with me for years. I DID NOT KNOW IT! NOT A CLUE! I know other people I have often cared for that I know have no inkling that I even care about them. WHY? Roy Oberson said it all in his song: "You Don't Know Me."
"To see a world in a grain of sand and a heaven in a wildflower.
Hold infinity in the palm of your hand and eternity in an hour..." Wm Blake
"Come forth into the light of things. Let Nature be your GUIDE!" Wordsworth...
Every person is struggling to survive in his or her own way and live the script they were handed.
Remember Shakespeare's famous line:
The world's a stage, or was it Life is a stage and we are the actors that strut? I'm sure someone has figured it out!
Maybe the answer is INVISIBLE! or so obvious we can't see it. Or is it that someone that prays for us showers us with a protective film. Something so cosmic and celestial it is beyong our knowing or understanding?
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