Preludes & Fugues
Finally I am taking time to write some of the things that have occurred the past week. A week ago I drove to Utah for Dad's 80th. It was a total success and he loved his presents from me! I spent the night with my brother. That was pleasant and the drive home went well except for the lack of sleep and insane drivers all over the damn highway. Walked into the kitchen and everyone was dragging ass. Yep, they got hit with 89 breakfasts, and a big night the night before but it all went well. (Absence makes them love me and appreciate me!)
Fall time is in the air. I love it. Autumn is my favorite season. It means the end of a very intense work season. Having money to pay off debt and purchase things I want to invest in like: A NEW RECORDING OF MY ORIGINAL MUSIC!
Possibly the annual trip to NYC, but how will I travel without my gels and lotions and potions? My trip to Boise will be a wonderful break and I do love teaching.
Also it means, color and the abundant harvest of spring and summer projects that may or may not have been completed, but the attempt was made and most of all it means another year has become a precious part of my past and the past does mold us into the human being we are evolving into.
Have lots of new subjects to write about and places I have discovered on the web.
I Will have a great new week and the only thing I failed miserably at this summer was: WORKING OUT! I simply was toooooo f---ing tired to lift weights!
I will repent in October. Off to work I go...
Saturday, August 26, 2006
Saturday, August 19, 2006
OMG, 20 more years?
Preludes & Fugues
Wed. my father turned 80. We are very close. Everything that happens to him physically seems to happen genetically to either me or my brother. GENES! I spoke with him by telephone Wed. and he said, "See, you will probably no doubt live for at least another 20 years!"
My father will have out lived all of his siblings, and most of his family. My grandmother did live to be 84. So, I have 20 more years of good health and productivity as well as IF I DO NOT SUFFER A FATAL ACCIDENT, with the help of modern medicine, I may make it to 90, then I WILL DECIDE If I wish to live any longer!
Fires every where. Casper, WY is a disaster area. Idaho is burning up and Utah always has fires along with California and of course the desserts. BUT, so far we have been fortunate in this neck of the woods. NO FIRES!
I am driving to Utah this after noon to attend a dinner party in honor of my father's Birthday. This is the first time, (except for a funeral) that I have ever left my Restaurant on a weekend! I am a nervous wreck!
Will they remember to bake a turkey tonight? Shut the dish washer OFF? Leave out the chicken and steak for the next day? The list is endless...what ever happens, it does not matter because I only have one father, but I may have many restaurants in my life!
So, with I Pod charged, Cell Phone Charged, Meds and a quick change of clothes I will drive out of here around 1 PM and arrive in Ogden at 5 PM. Spend the night and drive back to WY very early for Sunday Brunch!
I feel Autumn in the air. My anxiety has dropped so something must be going right. I have had to FIGHT this indescribable feeling of depression and anxiety that washes over me completely 'out of the blue' and then leaves...It usually indicates that something of a very serious nature is in the process of becoming a reality! But, it seems to have finally stopped it's attack of chemical and emotional frenzy!
Will talk soon. Seize the day baby! (or what ever is close at hand!)
Wed. my father turned 80. We are very close. Everything that happens to him physically seems to happen genetically to either me or my brother. GENES! I spoke with him by telephone Wed. and he said, "See, you will probably no doubt live for at least another 20 years!"
My father will have out lived all of his siblings, and most of his family. My grandmother did live to be 84. So, I have 20 more years of good health and productivity as well as IF I DO NOT SUFFER A FATAL ACCIDENT, with the help of modern medicine, I may make it to 90, then I WILL DECIDE If I wish to live any longer!
Fires every where. Casper, WY is a disaster area. Idaho is burning up and Utah always has fires along with California and of course the desserts. BUT, so far we have been fortunate in this neck of the woods. NO FIRES!
I am driving to Utah this after noon to attend a dinner party in honor of my father's Birthday. This is the first time, (except for a funeral) that I have ever left my Restaurant on a weekend! I am a nervous wreck!
Will they remember to bake a turkey tonight? Shut the dish washer OFF? Leave out the chicken and steak for the next day? The list is endless...what ever happens, it does not matter because I only have one father, but I may have many restaurants in my life!
So, with I Pod charged, Cell Phone Charged, Meds and a quick change of clothes I will drive out of here around 1 PM and arrive in Ogden at 5 PM. Spend the night and drive back to WY very early for Sunday Brunch!
I feel Autumn in the air. My anxiety has dropped so something must be going right. I have had to FIGHT this indescribable feeling of depression and anxiety that washes over me completely 'out of the blue' and then leaves...It usually indicates that something of a very serious nature is in the process of becoming a reality! But, it seems to have finally stopped it's attack of chemical and emotional frenzy!
Will talk soon. Seize the day baby! (or what ever is close at hand!)
Friday, August 11, 2006
Up lifting graves.
Preludes & Fugues
Monday was an interesting day:
There is a very old cemetery here in Alpine. It is hidden in a forest of trees near a 4-H Camp ground. In 1969 by Partner's oldest and youngest brothers died in a plane crash in the near by mountains. They were buried in that cemetery. In 1988 Michael's father was buried in the same cemetery next to the boys. After many problems over the years with the cemetery Michael decided to uplift the graves, have the bodies cremated and build a beautiful memorial on the property the house we live in sits on.
Monday all three coffins were lifted. The lids had collapsed. The bodies were pretty much gone except for some clothing, jewelry and newspaper clippings that were placed in the coffins.
FIRST TIME IN over thirty years the boys had seen sunlight! It was not a scary, spooky ordeal, just a very emotional and traumatic experience in the fact that it brought back so many buried feelings...and the stark facts of how we deal with the dead and their remains!
I will say this: I do not wish to be buried in a totally black hole in the ground to rot and never be a part of the elements! What a barbaric, ancient ritual, of mummy-fying a human body with poison and then burying it 6 feet under ground to decay! Free the remains to the winds and sun and starlight!
Death will come to us all and I am sure when I am dead I will not care where and what in hell is done to my remains, but IF I LOVED SOMEONE I WOULD NOT BURY THEM IN BLACKNESS but set their remains free to soar with their spirit as it free from the body. Cremation is not a bad thing!
Now, at last all three of these loved ones are in a safe place and closure has taken place! Come see the memorial. Of course we will charge a small fee for the viewing of the STONES!
Monday was an interesting day:
There is a very old cemetery here in Alpine. It is hidden in a forest of trees near a 4-H Camp ground. In 1969 by Partner's oldest and youngest brothers died in a plane crash in the near by mountains. They were buried in that cemetery. In 1988 Michael's father was buried in the same cemetery next to the boys. After many problems over the years with the cemetery Michael decided to uplift the graves, have the bodies cremated and build a beautiful memorial on the property the house we live in sits on.
Monday all three coffins were lifted. The lids had collapsed. The bodies were pretty much gone except for some clothing, jewelry and newspaper clippings that were placed in the coffins.
FIRST TIME IN over thirty years the boys had seen sunlight! It was not a scary, spooky ordeal, just a very emotional and traumatic experience in the fact that it brought back so many buried feelings...and the stark facts of how we deal with the dead and their remains!
I will say this: I do not wish to be buried in a totally black hole in the ground to rot and never be a part of the elements! What a barbaric, ancient ritual, of mummy-fying a human body with poison and then burying it 6 feet under ground to decay! Free the remains to the winds and sun and starlight!
Death will come to us all and I am sure when I am dead I will not care where and what in hell is done to my remains, but IF I LOVED SOMEONE I WOULD NOT BURY THEM IN BLACKNESS but set their remains free to soar with their spirit as it free from the body. Cremation is not a bad thing!
Now, at last all three of these loved ones are in a safe place and closure has taken place! Come see the memorial. Of course we will charge a small fee for the viewing of the STONES!
Monday, August 07, 2006
The past meet the present...
Preludes & Fugues
Last night was the last Concert/Dance event. Fantastic crowd, lots of dancing and the moon in the sky was something out of ET!
A dear friend that I have known since I was 21 was here for the music. She presented me with a cassette recording she made of a concert I performed August 18, 1976, the bicentennial year. I was 29 and would turn 30 in Nov. of that year. I was a Piano Performance Major at the U of U and never did complete the course as I did not like the INSTITUTIONALIZED SANCTITY AND FACULTY AND I PERORM DRASTICALLY ON TESTS AND EXAMS, therefore I chose a the path of a free spirited musician and made my own kind of music! (In truth I do not regret not earned a college degree. Most of my friends that have one do jobs that have nothing to do with their educational degrees from Universities!) The tape is OLD... The playing amazed me! Yes, there are glitches, but I have not played Schubert or Debussy like that in years! This same woman presented me with a box full of my correspondence, (letters to her) that she had saved since 1969 during my 7 years with USO! Talk about the past catching up with you! I am so happy that I have lived long enough to actually look back on all this a in truth enjoy the place I am at PRESENTLY because of the place I WAS AT YEARS AGO.
Now begins different challenges with the business. School stars in 18 days, that means day help is reduced to ME? Sunday brunch's will slow down and the weather will determine a lot of events. The canopy for my patio dining area finally has been made and delivered... NOW THAT THE MUSICALS ARE OVER! But better late than not! It will make dining on the patio much more pleasant during the rainy season. BTW, PATIENCE has never been one of my high marks.
I need a long, long, sleep, a deep massage and most of all to replenish my energy levels! So I drink coffee! God I do love COFFEE! So I'm going for Coffee.
Last night was the last Concert/Dance event. Fantastic crowd, lots of dancing and the moon in the sky was something out of ET!
A dear friend that I have known since I was 21 was here for the music. She presented me with a cassette recording she made of a concert I performed August 18, 1976, the bicentennial year. I was 29 and would turn 30 in Nov. of that year. I was a Piano Performance Major at the U of U and never did complete the course as I did not like the INSTITUTIONALIZED SANCTITY AND FACULTY AND I PERORM DRASTICALLY ON TESTS AND EXAMS, therefore I chose a the path of a free spirited musician and made my own kind of music! (In truth I do not regret not earned a college degree. Most of my friends that have one do jobs that have nothing to do with their educational degrees from Universities!) The tape is OLD... The playing amazed me! Yes, there are glitches, but I have not played Schubert or Debussy like that in years! This same woman presented me with a box full of my correspondence, (letters to her) that she had saved since 1969 during my 7 years with USO! Talk about the past catching up with you! I am so happy that I have lived long enough to actually look back on all this a in truth enjoy the place I am at PRESENTLY because of the place I WAS AT YEARS AGO.
Now begins different challenges with the business. School stars in 18 days, that means day help is reduced to ME? Sunday brunch's will slow down and the weather will determine a lot of events. The canopy for my patio dining area finally has been made and delivered... NOW THAT THE MUSICALS ARE OVER! But better late than not! It will make dining on the patio much more pleasant during the rainy season. BTW, PATIENCE has never been one of my high marks.
I need a long, long, sleep, a deep massage and most of all to replenish my energy levels! So I drink coffee! God I do love COFFEE! So I'm going for Coffee.
Thursday, August 03, 2006
The Beauty of Men...
Preludes & Fugues
In 1968 a woman in NYC told me that the most beautiful human beings were young men! She did not elaborate why boys and men were more beautiful than girls and women, but stated her point with such profound speech and completeness I totally believed her. I began observing young boys and men younger than me and mind you I was 21 years old. I observed older men and decided that the ideal age for a man would be between 38 and 45.
I think being a teen ager is difficult no matter if you are female or male, but, the older I get the more I agree with that woman's statement. I see young women that dress horribly with body fat hanging out and showing chunky bum cleavage as well as bad hair and skin. Mind you, there are the occasional young woman that are stunning, but for the most part YUCKY looking babes, covered in grease and make up from hell.
Most young men, seem to radiate a certain shyness and yet confidence, maybe because, they endure endless erections and are adored...?
I read a poem this morning that made me think of the beauty of young men by John Wieners. Here is is:
"TWO YEARS LATER"
The hollow eyes of shock remain electric sockets burnt out in the skull...
The beauty of men never disappears
but drives a blue car through the stars...
Look into the night sky and you just may see a beautiful man driving around the roads of the firmament hidden in the haze of blue sky! EYES TO THE SKIES!
I find beauty in many things, but it is wonderful to also see young men and know what they are thinking and to know I was once one of them and have matured to the man I am now! NO REGRETS, just joy!
In 1968 a woman in NYC told me that the most beautiful human beings were young men! She did not elaborate why boys and men were more beautiful than girls and women, but stated her point with such profound speech and completeness I totally believed her. I began observing young boys and men younger than me and mind you I was 21 years old. I observed older men and decided that the ideal age for a man would be between 38 and 45.
I think being a teen ager is difficult no matter if you are female or male, but, the older I get the more I agree with that woman's statement. I see young women that dress horribly with body fat hanging out and showing chunky bum cleavage as well as bad hair and skin. Mind you, there are the occasional young woman that are stunning, but for the most part YUCKY looking babes, covered in grease and make up from hell.
Most young men, seem to radiate a certain shyness and yet confidence, maybe because, they endure endless erections and are adored...?
I read a poem this morning that made me think of the beauty of young men by John Wieners. Here is is:
"TWO YEARS LATER"
The hollow eyes of shock remain electric sockets burnt out in the skull...
The beauty of men never disappears
but drives a blue car through the stars...
Look into the night sky and you just may see a beautiful man driving around the roads of the firmament hidden in the haze of blue sky! EYES TO THE SKIES!
I find beauty in many things, but it is wonderful to also see young men and know what they are thinking and to know I was once one of them and have matured to the man I am now! NO REGRETS, just joy!
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