Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Random thoughts...

Yesterday I enjoyed lunch at my favorite cafe. I have written about the cafe in my past blogs.

I sat at the front window, upstairs over looking a very busy sidewalk full of people. One of my favorite hobbies is observing people. The way they dress, the different tempos they walk to, the endless shapes of body parts. Eyes and the expressions the human face portrays. Free entertainment.

I glanced toward the back of the dinning room where an ornate black board hangs on the wall.
Written in white chalk were these words:

"Wine is a constant proof that God loves us and likes to see us happy!" I grinned from ear to ear.

I always thought Christ's words at the last supper were fitting, "Drink this wine in remembrance of my blood which I shed for you..." well, my liver has enjoyed a hell of a lot of remembering Christ's blood... I should be saved with out a problem.

I happen to regard GOOD WINE as something very special. One reason: I cook with it. It does enhance certain dishes and meats. All of the steaks grilled in my restaurant have a splash of red wine poured on them as they are sizzling on the grill. It helps tenderize the meat, enhances the flavor as well as it smells wonderful! Wine has existed for thousands of years. It was one of the first antibiotics. The Chinese used wine for many medical purposes eons ago.

I will stop rambling about the glory of wine, but I did love the words on the wall in the restaurant. Wine is a constant proof that God loves us!.... (that may have a different meaning for someone who lives with a wino!) SORRY!

I seem to be dreaming more than I can ever recall. I have forever dreamed in COLOR. My dreams are not upsetting, but so intense and strange? Some of the images of people and places in my dreams of late are of faces I cannot identify?

I meditated on the situation the other day and realized: So much of my love life has depended on a "GLANCE" of a stranger... something caught in the wind as it were, and the GLANCE returned. Like walking down the streets of NYC and a person's glance will catch my eye... there have actually been times when the effect was as if a fist squeezed my heart and cracked a tiny flask at my heart's center saturating it with love!

I think some of those moments have been "imprinted" into my mind in such a way they are now coming out in dreams... I am not complaining.

The other day my taxi driver was a young man from Timaru NZ. (anything under 50 is very young to me anymore!)

He asked me where I was from, (the usual dialogue). Most of the cabby's know me because of my coming to QT for many years... I never even tell them my address, they simply know we are driving home!

I told him I had been coming to NZ for 22 years. Well, you would have thought he had a live Encyclopedia in his cab. He asked me if I liked the changes in QT. I said, of course! As we were driving up to 11 Panorama Place I pointed out sites that are now built upon with huge hotels, gardens, business buildings. He slowed the taxi down and said tell me about this and that... as we drove along the streets. I enjoyed relating my memories of what was then and not now!

Ballaret Street is one hell of a STEEP HILL. I told him how I used to walk up that hill with groceries and a cigarette in my mouth. NOT TODAY! The corner where the Glebe Hotel sits was an abandon old house with gorgeous apricot trees and apple trees. I'd fill plastic sacks with the fruit and bake pies! Where the Millennium Hotel now sits was a paddock. Full of goats and sheep. I would run through the paddock on my way to the Body Worx Gym early in the mornings. He was loving the history.

Then suddenly a thought flew into my brain: He was asking for "MEMORIES" too young for himself to know and that all memories are only memories of memories!

When I was 17 years old I asked my Piano Teacher all about his concert career in the 20's and 30's~ My Landlady Mabel had stories about her life in Green river WY and San Fransisco during the depression... parties, music, deaths... places that no longer existed... I asked my grandparents about their pasts... amazing things, but I could only imagine and gaze at photos.
They were memories with in memories...

The young man driving my taxi will have his own memories within memories one day... I love my memories, but I LOVE THE FUTURE. The future contain my new memories.

After leaving the taxi I thought how sometimes my mind stands apart from my body. It has many times during moments of elation, depression, tragedy, pain, suffering beyond my imagination... and then my dreams! We ride our souls in sleep like horses and sometimes the horse knows best where and how to go!...

I have survived many situations in my life... I have been lonely beyond words at times, and so confused because of certain dogmas that were pounded inside my brain as a child. I have forgiven and I hope been forgiven because of many passionate and strange love affairs, yet I cling to the hope and the belief everything in my life is for a purpose. It is for something beyond my imagination.

I listen to news, I read, I can still reason... I only KNOW one thing that equalizes all of us NO MATTER WHO YOU MAY THINK YOU ARE AND THE WORLD THINKS YOU ARE:
DEATH EQUALIZES ALL OF US.

No great leader, no politician, no religious icon, no one... we are ALL equal in death. BTW, hope I don't die tonight, but If, just IF I DO, I will be equal with some pretty amazing people.

Enough Random thoughts...



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