Preludes & Fugues
Tomorrow I will pull the shades over the windows of the house. After shutting the door I will secure the lock. Electricity, water and movement will cease and only the invisible memory of the past four months will haunt the rooms.
Flight to Auckland in the afternoon. Spend the night in Auckland and then fly out to LAX on the 28th. I've had four months full of adventure, contemplation, rest, creativity and most of all peace.
It is cold, snowing in the mountains and very dense cloud cover. Winter is storming around making his presence known. Spring and summer await me along with work and friends. Mother's Day will always mean a celebration of joy and happiness for me as It was the day I discovered Alpine WY 21 years ago!
I will not post a blog until after May 2nd. HOWEVER, I will continue to use this as my journal and sacred space! As Alfie said: "AH! I AM A BLEST MAN!" I am most of all GRATEFUL for all that I am and have.
Farewell New Zealand until December and to friends in Queenstown, you know I love you.
Tuesday, April 25, 2006
Saturday, April 22, 2006
Intimations of Immortality
Preludes & Fugues
Our birth is but a sleep and a forgetting;
The Soul that rises with us, our life's Star,
Hath had elsewhere it's setting,
And cometh from afar:
Not in entire forgetfulness, And not in utter nakedness,
But trailing clouds of glory do we come
From God, Who is our home:
______________________________________________
Thanks to the human heart by which we live,
Thanks to it's tenderness, it's joys, and fear,
To me the meanest flower that blows can give
Thoughts that do often lie too deep for tears.
Wm Wordsworth 1770 - 1850
I have always found comfort and joy in these lines...I wonder IF Beethoven
ever read much of Wordsworth? They were born the same year, 1770 but Beethoven died in 1827. Billy Boy lived to be 80 years old! Ancient for the times! Ludwig only made it to 57. Not old by today's life span. God, I can only imagine what living to 80 would be like. I never dreamed I'd live to see 40!
IMMORTALITY!
Our birth is but a sleep and a forgetting;
The Soul that rises with us, our life's Star,
Hath had elsewhere it's setting,
And cometh from afar:
Not in entire forgetfulness, And not in utter nakedness,
But trailing clouds of glory do we come
From God, Who is our home:
______________________________________________
Thanks to the human heart by which we live,
Thanks to it's tenderness, it's joys, and fear,
To me the meanest flower that blows can give
Thoughts that do often lie too deep for tears.
Wm Wordsworth 1770 - 1850
I have always found comfort and joy in these lines...I wonder IF Beethoven
ever read much of Wordsworth? They were born the same year, 1770 but Beethoven died in 1827. Billy Boy lived to be 80 years old! Ancient for the times! Ludwig only made it to 57. Not old by today's life span. God, I can only imagine what living to 80 would be like. I never dreamed I'd live to see 40!
IMMORTALITY!
Friday, April 21, 2006
Einstein & Russell
Preludes & Fugues
Young people today lack ROLE MODLES, HEROS. People you can trust and depend upon. Parents make dreadful mistakes and always will, so as young people we choose 'role models'. Statesmen, athletic super stars, movie stars, the list is endless and always disappointing. Presidents of countries and corporations lie, and kill in the name of power and money. Golf to football stars make ridiculous amounts of money and then are arrested for drugs, sex scandals and the list is endless.
I had some great musicians to idolize and one man I will always revere. ALBERT EINSTEIN. Found this PROPHECY made in the last year of Einstein's life, July 9, 1955, he and Bertrand Russell issued the following manifesto:
"In the tragic situation which confronts humanity, we feel that scientists should assemble to appraise the perils that have arisen as a result of the development of WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION... We appeal as human beings to human beings: remember your humanity... If you can do so, the way lies open to a new paradise; if you cannot, there lies before you the risk of universal death."
Huh mmmmm! NO ONE LISTENED! Sad. I have come to the conclusion that the only way to stop the insanity is: NOT MARCHING and DIEING IN THE STREETS. The 'key' is to become a giant CEO in one of the biggest corporations.
Politicians are nothing but 'talking puppet heads' for BIG MEGA POWERFUL BUSINESS from corn flakes to nuclear WMD. Young heros will be the men and women that change the corporate world power that controls media, medicine, schools, prisons, immigration and yes organized religion.
The old paradigms of thinking continue to rule. DIVISIONS, RIGHT vs. WRONG.
Them against us. Nation vs. nation, race against race, religion against religion. Rich against the poor, communism against democracy, terrorist against non-terrorist. CAPITALISM seems to REQUIRE A CONSTANT ENEMY. I mean, we live in a world of THREATS of DESTRUCTION from the gods of the Bible, Koran, Book of Mormon, a never ending thought pattern of fear and destruction that lead to our demise. I suppose that the fear of death is the rock bottom factor!
What's that old line? THE TRUTH SHALL SET YOU FREE. It depends on your meaning of FREEDOM. Everyone's idea of freedom is so different. I like Lennon's words to a beautiful song, "IMAGINE". I listen to it sung by Liza to Sinatra. It says it all. Maybe almighty GOD, Allah, Jesus Christ, and SATAN could settle their differences out of court? and leave us out of their fight!
Young people today lack ROLE MODLES, HEROS. People you can trust and depend upon. Parents make dreadful mistakes and always will, so as young people we choose 'role models'. Statesmen, athletic super stars, movie stars, the list is endless and always disappointing. Presidents of countries and corporations lie, and kill in the name of power and money. Golf to football stars make ridiculous amounts of money and then are arrested for drugs, sex scandals and the list is endless.
I had some great musicians to idolize and one man I will always revere. ALBERT EINSTEIN. Found this PROPHECY made in the last year of Einstein's life, July 9, 1955, he and Bertrand Russell issued the following manifesto:
"In the tragic situation which confronts humanity, we feel that scientists should assemble to appraise the perils that have arisen as a result of the development of WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION... We appeal as human beings to human beings: remember your humanity... If you can do so, the way lies open to a new paradise; if you cannot, there lies before you the risk of universal death."
Huh mmmmm! NO ONE LISTENED! Sad. I have come to the conclusion that the only way to stop the insanity is: NOT MARCHING and DIEING IN THE STREETS. The 'key' is to become a giant CEO in one of the biggest corporations.
Politicians are nothing but 'talking puppet heads' for BIG MEGA POWERFUL BUSINESS from corn flakes to nuclear WMD. Young heros will be the men and women that change the corporate world power that controls media, medicine, schools, prisons, immigration and yes organized religion.
The old paradigms of thinking continue to rule. DIVISIONS, RIGHT vs. WRONG.
Them against us. Nation vs. nation, race against race, religion against religion. Rich against the poor, communism against democracy, terrorist against non-terrorist. CAPITALISM seems to REQUIRE A CONSTANT ENEMY. I mean, we live in a world of THREATS of DESTRUCTION from the gods of the Bible, Koran, Book of Mormon, a never ending thought pattern of fear and destruction that lead to our demise. I suppose that the fear of death is the rock bottom factor!
What's that old line? THE TRUTH SHALL SET YOU FREE. It depends on your meaning of FREEDOM. Everyone's idea of freedom is so different. I like Lennon's words to a beautiful song, "IMAGINE". I listen to it sung by Liza to Sinatra. It says it all. Maybe almighty GOD, Allah, Jesus Christ, and SATAN could settle their differences out of court? and leave us out of their fight!
Wednesday, April 19, 2006
Einstein & Russell
Fifty years later corporate America and it's politicians are using and making WMD like never before dreamed by Einstein. I'd ask for intervention from another planet, or universe because the god of this world disappeared thousands of years ago and it aint coming back kids!
Gays, Blacks, Hispanics, women, children did not create such WEAPONS. Even Eisenhower said the country could not operate as a war machine.
I don't know IF humans in mass demonstrations can stop the madness???
Life goes on and on with E=mc2. Our mass may become Energy very soon!
life's golden coil...
Preludes & Fugues
Yesterday I was in the city of Dunedin. An absolutely "perfectly PERFECT" day. Autumn light, leaves gently falling onto green grass.
M. had two appointments with the orthodontist so I had three hours to myself.
I walked to the gardens at First Church and sat on a comfortable wooden bench. I felt centered and completely relaxed. Good time for recharging one's mind, heart and soul.
Sound is meditative and healing to me so I closed my eyes, put my head back and began concentrating on all the various caca-fonic sounds surrounding me. Coins falling on the sidewalk. Car engines, footsteps on gravel, birds, voices, the list is endless. Without warning I begin to feel myself spin out of my body. It was frightening and yet so exciting. My conscious mind kept saying: "You are having a stroke, dying or a "flash back" of a 'shroom' trip in the 60's."
I felt amazingly happy and light. Suddenly I heard my back pack fall on the grass. My ego said, "Don't let go! NO ONE YOU KNOW, KNOWS WHERE YOU ARE!" I then thought: " It really doesn't matter. Your passport, two credit cards, journal and I pod are inside the pack along with some cash." Then it happened: I heard a voice... I was not in full consciousness, but opened my eyes and standing in front of me was a young man probably 17 maybe 18 years old. "Sir, may I have $1.50?"
" I don't have change for the bus to Anderson Beach."
I could actually sense myself squeezing into my body!
I handed him the exact change. He thanked me and walked off...a gentle memory bite of a previous sound kicked in: the tinkle of odd coins falling on the sidewalk and footsteps on gravel. Previously, I had heard odd change falling on the sidewalk and footsteps. This stranger was connected to both sounds!
Just maybe the super string theory in physics is a fact...life's "golden coil" we are all wired into is real. I walked back to the hotel aware of every thing surrounding me as well below and above. Every blade of grass, store window and sensation was in a different light.
Interesting, when M. arrived back from the orthodontist, he informed me that he was getting 'state of the art' hearing aids the next day!...Serendipity? He has suffered hearing loss in his right ear for years. I felt a thrumming vibration move through my entire body. I smiled and said, "Today has been a day of all kinds of beautiful sounds."
Yesterday I was in the city of Dunedin. An absolutely "perfectly PERFECT" day. Autumn light, leaves gently falling onto green grass.
M. had two appointments with the orthodontist so I had three hours to myself.
I walked to the gardens at First Church and sat on a comfortable wooden bench. I felt centered and completely relaxed. Good time for recharging one's mind, heart and soul.
Sound is meditative and healing to me so I closed my eyes, put my head back and began concentrating on all the various caca-fonic sounds surrounding me. Coins falling on the sidewalk. Car engines, footsteps on gravel, birds, voices, the list is endless. Without warning I begin to feel myself spin out of my body. It was frightening and yet so exciting. My conscious mind kept saying: "You are having a stroke, dying or a "flash back" of a 'shroom' trip in the 60's."
I felt amazingly happy and light. Suddenly I heard my back pack fall on the grass. My ego said, "Don't let go! NO ONE YOU KNOW, KNOWS WHERE YOU ARE!" I then thought: " It really doesn't matter. Your passport, two credit cards, journal and I pod are inside the pack along with some cash." Then it happened: I heard a voice... I was not in full consciousness, but opened my eyes and standing in front of me was a young man probably 17 maybe 18 years old. "Sir, may I have $1.50?"
" I don't have change for the bus to Anderson Beach."
I could actually sense myself squeezing into my body!
I handed him the exact change. He thanked me and walked off...a gentle memory bite of a previous sound kicked in: the tinkle of odd coins falling on the sidewalk and footsteps on gravel. Previously, I had heard odd change falling on the sidewalk and footsteps. This stranger was connected to both sounds!
Just maybe the super string theory in physics is a fact...life's "golden coil" we are all wired into is real. I walked back to the hotel aware of every thing surrounding me as well below and above. Every blade of grass, store window and sensation was in a different light.
Interesting, when M. arrived back from the orthodontist, he informed me that he was getting 'state of the art' hearing aids the next day!...Serendipity? He has suffered hearing loss in his right ear for years. I felt a thrumming vibration move through my entire body. I smiled and said, "Today has been a day of all kinds of beautiful sounds."
Wednesday, April 12, 2006
I talk to the dead
Preludes & Fugues
Many years ago I enrolled in a class at College: THE PLAYS OF SHAKESPEARE. I loved the class. One day the professor, who was way up there in earth years, was late! Even with NO PROFESSOR not one student left the hall.
In a sudden flurry he dashed into the room and up to the podium.
He explained that he had been walking past the cemetery and began strolling amid the head stones, where most of his friends were living. So, he began visiting with different people WHO WERE DEAD and he and lost track of time.
I have never forgotten the story.
All of my life I have "talked" to people I have loved and known who have crossed over...I am not talking about cross-dressing. I MEAN DIED.
Sometimes I feel they are close, very close indeed. I was reading bits and pieces of poetry and such before I started my morning meditation and came upon something from the Prophet that brought much joy to my heart.
"IT WAS BUT YESTERDAY WE MET IN A DREAM. YOU HAVE SUNG TO ME IN MY ALONENESS, AND I OF YOUR LONGINGS HAVE BUILT A TOWER IN THE SKY.
IF IN THE TWILIGHT OF MEMORY WE SHOULD MEET ONCE MORE, WE SHALL SPEAK AGAIN TOGETHER AND YOU SHALL SING TO ME A DEEPER SONG. AND IF OUR HANDS SHOULD MEET IN ANOTHER DREAM, WE SHALL BUILD ANOTHER TOWER IN THE SKY...."
Today is a day of much celebration for me. A friend that has been ill will be made whole again! SO BE IT!
Many years ago I enrolled in a class at College: THE PLAYS OF SHAKESPEARE. I loved the class. One day the professor, who was way up there in earth years, was late! Even with NO PROFESSOR not one student left the hall.
In a sudden flurry he dashed into the room and up to the podium.
He explained that he had been walking past the cemetery and began strolling amid the head stones, where most of his friends were living. So, he began visiting with different people WHO WERE DEAD and he and lost track of time.
I have never forgotten the story.
All of my life I have "talked" to people I have loved and known who have crossed over...I am not talking about cross-dressing. I MEAN DIED.
Sometimes I feel they are close, very close indeed. I was reading bits and pieces of poetry and such before I started my morning meditation and came upon something from the Prophet that brought much joy to my heart.
"IT WAS BUT YESTERDAY WE MET IN A DREAM. YOU HAVE SUNG TO ME IN MY ALONENESS, AND I OF YOUR LONGINGS HAVE BUILT A TOWER IN THE SKY.
IF IN THE TWILIGHT OF MEMORY WE SHOULD MEET ONCE MORE, WE SHALL SPEAK AGAIN TOGETHER AND YOU SHALL SING TO ME A DEEPER SONG. AND IF OUR HANDS SHOULD MEET IN ANOTHER DREAM, WE SHALL BUILD ANOTHER TOWER IN THE SKY...."
Today is a day of much celebration for me. A friend that has been ill will be made whole again! SO BE IT!
Tuesday, April 11, 2006
Botox...
Preludes & Fugues
I have written 5 blogs the past 24 hours and just before posting them I hit the delete key! Is it my sub conscious mind or some other force NOT allowing me to publish these recent blogs?
Yesterday I went to the Clinic at 2:45 PM. The Doctor was over 6' tall, a look a like for George Clooney! I mean it. All fear and anxiety dissipated to, PLEASE INJECT ALL OF MY CREASES! He was excellent. He explained that BOTOX does not take years off your face. Only a face lift 'sometimes' achieves that desired result. Botox takes three months IN, three months OUT. Meaning, I will need another treatment three months from now. Then it will hold for usually 6 months, then another treatment and from then on once a year.
I had 13 injections. Three between the eyes, two on each side of the forehead, three on each side of eyes for crow's feet, one on each side of the lower jaw. NO PAIN, NO SWELLING, NO BRUISING.
THIS MORNING SAME OLD MOSAIC THAT HAS STARRED BACK AT ME FOR YEARS. So we'll see in a couple of weeks. BTW this was not a cheap date. It cost over $800.00 NZD.
Life is an adventure and one can't complain about something IF one has not taken advantage of all the ways to overcome something they wish to change. Mind you smile lines are not life threatening, but I would like to appear a bit smoother and awake!
I'm outta here.
I have written 5 blogs the past 24 hours and just before posting them I hit the delete key! Is it my sub conscious mind or some other force NOT allowing me to publish these recent blogs?
Yesterday I went to the Clinic at 2:45 PM. The Doctor was over 6' tall, a look a like for George Clooney! I mean it. All fear and anxiety dissipated to, PLEASE INJECT ALL OF MY CREASES! He was excellent. He explained that BOTOX does not take years off your face. Only a face lift 'sometimes' achieves that desired result. Botox takes three months IN, three months OUT. Meaning, I will need another treatment three months from now. Then it will hold for usually 6 months, then another treatment and from then on once a year.
I had 13 injections. Three between the eyes, two on each side of the forehead, three on each side of eyes for crow's feet, one on each side of the lower jaw. NO PAIN, NO SWELLING, NO BRUISING.
THIS MORNING SAME OLD MOSAIC THAT HAS STARRED BACK AT ME FOR YEARS. So we'll see in a couple of weeks. BTW this was not a cheap date. It cost over $800.00 NZD.
Life is an adventure and one can't complain about something IF one has not taken advantage of all the ways to overcome something they wish to change. Mind you smile lines are not life threatening, but I would like to appear a bit smoother and awake!
I'm outta here.
Sunday, April 09, 2006
Until WHAT?
Preludes & Fugues
I received a phone call from the states yesterday morning. It was my sister. First thing that slid across my mind was my mother or father had turned very ill. NO, she called to inform me that the husband of my niece that lives in Southern Utah was drowned to death in a very bad canoe accident on the Virgin River early in the morning. Devastating. They have a 9 month old baby girl, just purchased a new home and John was attending college as well as working full time.
I called home. Life seems to march on regardless of death. I was momentarily reminded of ever so many friends and family members that have left this dimension via the process we call DEATH!
I am not feeling depression, I feel grateful in one respect: IF HE HAD LIVED AND HAD SUFFERED SERIOUS BRAIN DAMAGE THE CHANCES OF HIS LIFE BEING REDUCED TO A BED, LIFE SUPPORT SYSTEM AND ENDLESS MEDICAL CARE...NO!
He is in a better place and life will move on until his daughter and child choose to go where he has gone.
Life is simply an adventure. Do we choose the events and problems that are presented before us in a lifetime so that we can learn? balance karma? does everything that happen occur because of FATE? I learned do not spend a life time worrying about such subjects, or else you will waste precious life that you are able to enjoy and fulfill so many of your dreams.
Nice day. Spent it in the wine country. Had a wonderful lunch at the Carrick Winery, Field mushrooms on polenta and green salad. The wine was delicious and the espresso after lunch perfect. The leaves are in stunning color. The moon is shedding it's pale light upon the snow capped peaks as I write. Life is good! I am going to the piano and play 'Clair de lune...' perfect piece for a benediction on this day.
I received a phone call from the states yesterday morning. It was my sister. First thing that slid across my mind was my mother or father had turned very ill. NO, she called to inform me that the husband of my niece that lives in Southern Utah was drowned to death in a very bad canoe accident on the Virgin River early in the morning. Devastating. They have a 9 month old baby girl, just purchased a new home and John was attending college as well as working full time.
I called home. Life seems to march on regardless of death. I was momentarily reminded of ever so many friends and family members that have left this dimension via the process we call DEATH!
I am not feeling depression, I feel grateful in one respect: IF HE HAD LIVED AND HAD SUFFERED SERIOUS BRAIN DAMAGE THE CHANCES OF HIS LIFE BEING REDUCED TO A BED, LIFE SUPPORT SYSTEM AND ENDLESS MEDICAL CARE...NO!
He is in a better place and life will move on until his daughter and child choose to go where he has gone.
Life is simply an adventure. Do we choose the events and problems that are presented before us in a lifetime so that we can learn? balance karma? does everything that happen occur because of FATE? I learned do not spend a life time worrying about such subjects, or else you will waste precious life that you are able to enjoy and fulfill so many of your dreams.
Nice day. Spent it in the wine country. Had a wonderful lunch at the Carrick Winery, Field mushrooms on polenta and green salad. The wine was delicious and the espresso after lunch perfect. The leaves are in stunning color. The moon is shedding it's pale light upon the snow capped peaks as I write. Life is good! I am going to the piano and play 'Clair de lune...' perfect piece for a benediction on this day.
Thursday, April 06, 2006
It's OVER until?
Preludes & Fugues
Reflexology was MAGIC today. Anna did not feel this oppressive sadness and NEITHER DID I. She could sense that my chakras are more balanced. I will do one more session on the 24th before flying to the States.
Went to the Clinic. God, it was busy to say the least, but got in with a doctor that had a great smile and brilliant blue eyes. ZYBAN is the name for Wellbutrin down here. Hoping they had some generic but no such luck. I got the how to stop smoking booklet, and all the big informational packets that come with the STOP SMOKING PRESCRIPTION. I needed stop depression. But I got the script.
Milne called back from ABOUTFACE and yes Tues. will be a BOTOX MOMENT!
Then to celebrate the survival and transformation out of this horrible DEPRESSION I purchased a piece of fantastic art! My dearest friend Wayne Noffsinger, as created something that IS MINE! The second I laid my eyes on it something ripped my heart open! I feel in love with the little man. Can't wait to have it on my piano! It is called: "THE WALKING WOUNDED". Some power was whispering in his inner ear when he set to creating this piece of art. Walking Wounded, is kind of a portrait of who I was, am, want to be... I called Wayne today and had the visa card in hand. (If you want to see this man's work go to:
bluefox.com or bluefox gallery.com He and his partner Tony are master artisans.)
I actually feel different. A shift inside of my head and heart. I finally know what the sages meant when they say things like: No one else can save you, only you can save your own life. To thine own-self be true and the list goes on. I am basking in this new found peace. I appreciate Beethoven in a way I never dreamed I would. He did create an archive of all the human emotions and dreams in his symphonies and almost everything he composed the last years of his life.
Going to Walnut Cottage for Dins. I'M OUTTA HERE.
Reflexology was MAGIC today. Anna did not feel this oppressive sadness and NEITHER DID I. She could sense that my chakras are more balanced. I will do one more session on the 24th before flying to the States.
Went to the Clinic. God, it was busy to say the least, but got in with a doctor that had a great smile and brilliant blue eyes. ZYBAN is the name for Wellbutrin down here. Hoping they had some generic but no such luck. I got the how to stop smoking booklet, and all the big informational packets that come with the STOP SMOKING PRESCRIPTION. I needed stop depression. But I got the script.
Milne called back from ABOUTFACE and yes Tues. will be a BOTOX MOMENT!
Then to celebrate the survival and transformation out of this horrible DEPRESSION I purchased a piece of fantastic art! My dearest friend Wayne Noffsinger, as created something that IS MINE! The second I laid my eyes on it something ripped my heart open! I feel in love with the little man. Can't wait to have it on my piano! It is called: "THE WALKING WOUNDED". Some power was whispering in his inner ear when he set to creating this piece of art. Walking Wounded, is kind of a portrait of who I was, am, want to be... I called Wayne today and had the visa card in hand. (If you want to see this man's work go to:
bluefox.com or bluefox gallery.com He and his partner Tony are master artisans.)
I actually feel different. A shift inside of my head and heart. I finally know what the sages meant when they say things like: No one else can save you, only you can save your own life. To thine own-self be true and the list goes on. I am basking in this new found peace. I appreciate Beethoven in a way I never dreamed I would. He did create an archive of all the human emotions and dreams in his symphonies and almost everything he composed the last years of his life.
Going to Walnut Cottage for Dins. I'M OUTTA HERE.
Wednesday, April 05, 2006
Preludes & Fugues
Preludes & Fugues
I just wrote about the blessing of technology, and in another blog composed a prelude about opening my chakras, then went through the painful process of deciding what and when something in my childhood made such an impression that so effectively 'closed down' more than one of my energy vortexes.
Today in the Christchurch Press front page there is an alarming story/article about a 16 year old boy who has been a victim of BULLY TEXTING. Unbelievable story of fear and intimidation that has gone on in this young man's life for the past two years. Also the fact that so many teens commit suicide because of this type of bullying! BULLYING VIA THE USE OF TECHNOLOGY. Cell phones!
My Prelude has developed into quite a FUGUE with many voices from a single IDEA/ thought/ CONCEPT! (this is what I love about Bach's Preludes and Fugues... subject is presented in a beautiful melodic form, then developed into many parts that originate from the subject (theme) but become so convoluted and complex!
Since Sunday I have been in a deep depression! I call it the Hormonal Cycle, just like women experience with their periods. Some months just seem easier than others. Probably due to stress, work, anxiety, uncontrollable situations and so forth. This particular "mood swing" for me is due to my want for CHANGE and accepting a different "ENERGY" and possibly "FORGIVING" so many things in my past. OMG at nearly 60 I am changing again???? (hell, I hope so.)
I am going to see about finally getting a prescription for my Wellbutrin, of which I have not taken for a month, and have a consultation for BOTOX therapy tomorrow at 9:30 AM. Hell, between those two things I really 'ought to sail somewhere over the rainbow in stunning colors. TO BE CONTINUED.
I just wrote about the blessing of technology, and in another blog composed a prelude about opening my chakras, then went through the painful process of deciding what and when something in my childhood made such an impression that so effectively 'closed down' more than one of my energy vortexes.
Today in the Christchurch Press front page there is an alarming story/article about a 16 year old boy who has been a victim of BULLY TEXTING. Unbelievable story of fear and intimidation that has gone on in this young man's life for the past two years. Also the fact that so many teens commit suicide because of this type of bullying! BULLYING VIA THE USE OF TECHNOLOGY. Cell phones!
My Prelude has developed into quite a FUGUE with many voices from a single IDEA/ thought/ CONCEPT! (this is what I love about Bach's Preludes and Fugues... subject is presented in a beautiful melodic form, then developed into many parts that originate from the subject (theme) but become so convoluted and complex!
Since Sunday I have been in a deep depression! I call it the Hormonal Cycle, just like women experience with their periods. Some months just seem easier than others. Probably due to stress, work, anxiety, uncontrollable situations and so forth. This particular "mood swing" for me is due to my want for CHANGE and accepting a different "ENERGY" and possibly "FORGIVING" so many things in my past. OMG at nearly 60 I am changing again???? (hell, I hope so.)
I am going to see about finally getting a prescription for my Wellbutrin, of which I have not taken for a month, and have a consultation for BOTOX therapy tomorrow at 9:30 AM. Hell, between those two things I really 'ought to sail somewhere over the rainbow in stunning colors. TO BE CONTINUED.
Tuesday, April 04, 2006
technology YES!!!
Preludes & Fugues
For the past 18 years I have REFUSED to have a telephone in the Kitchen at my Restaurant, BRENTHOVEN'S. You may ask why? How can you operate a business without a telephone? What if a horrible emergency occurs? ANSWER: There is a telephone in the OFFICE REGISTRATION which is not that far from my kitchen. Three years ago I realized it was becoming more and more of a problem for office help to walk away from the desk and bring me the wireless phone so I purchased a cell phone. MAGIC! There is not a phone hanging on the wall or screeching when we are working and I make all my orders, personal calls and texts from the small black telephone I carry in my pocket!
I could, but do not want to live without my Power Book G4 MAC computer. I do not want to live without my Apple I POD and I have two wonderful keyboards that have made my life as a musician so convenient and I can practice any hour of the day or night without driving anyone crazy with my scales, arpeggios, and repetitions of passages, over and over until I get the patterns secured within my musical brain.
I can only imagine how amazed my grandparents must have been when they used a telephone for the first time and heard a voice from miles away! Air planes, X-rays, cameras, refrigeration, automobiles. To think my first recording was a vynal 78 and we had 45's of two singles pressed! Within 3 years after that cassette recordings were taking over the world of recorded music! NOW DIGITAL technology is overwhelming. I wonder If we will one-day reincarnate any lifetime we desire digitally! (Easy way to operate Karmic justice without going through the birth cannel!)
I have a VODAFONE here in NZ. I call the United States every week. My parents, siblings and any business matter that needs sudden attention I take care of via E mails or Cell PHONE! I very well remember the hand written letters or detached voice delays in over seas long distance calls...and the cost of a LD phone call!
I know the world is "falling apart" BUT because of technology we have access to knowledge and truth like we have never known. We have satellites that take pictures of the earth's evolvement every second. One can argue global warming, the demise of the rain forests and tides, storms, and holes in the ozone till they are blue in the face, THE PROOF is in the pictures and data we record from outer space. The internet is almost beyond my mind's ability to comprehend at times. I can down load music, sheet music and send my music to anyone that wants it!
I like living in 2006 just fine. Wars, famine, rotten politics, bigots, religious dogmas, ignorance have always been around and will probably always be around, but the knowledge one has at their fingertips is a healing balm and gift from minds that paid big prices to make our current lives FABULOUS BABY!
One thing that depresses me is the money and technology spent on weapons of mass destruction and billions spent on air, sea and land transportation so Bush and his crusade can use them to make the world a safer place. If we used all the nuclear sources sitting inside thousands of missile heads to make fission power we would never worry about the loss of oil resources for thousands of years. ALAS! At least I can talk about it on this blog site!
Technology will not kill us, the lack of it and stupidity will. Cherio.
For the past 18 years I have REFUSED to have a telephone in the Kitchen at my Restaurant, BRENTHOVEN'S. You may ask why? How can you operate a business without a telephone? What if a horrible emergency occurs? ANSWER: There is a telephone in the OFFICE REGISTRATION which is not that far from my kitchen. Three years ago I realized it was becoming more and more of a problem for office help to walk away from the desk and bring me the wireless phone so I purchased a cell phone. MAGIC! There is not a phone hanging on the wall or screeching when we are working and I make all my orders, personal calls and texts from the small black telephone I carry in my pocket!
I could, but do not want to live without my Power Book G4 MAC computer. I do not want to live without my Apple I POD and I have two wonderful keyboards that have made my life as a musician so convenient and I can practice any hour of the day or night without driving anyone crazy with my scales, arpeggios, and repetitions of passages, over and over until I get the patterns secured within my musical brain.
I can only imagine how amazed my grandparents must have been when they used a telephone for the first time and heard a voice from miles away! Air planes, X-rays, cameras, refrigeration, automobiles. To think my first recording was a vynal 78 and we had 45's of two singles pressed! Within 3 years after that cassette recordings were taking over the world of recorded music! NOW DIGITAL technology is overwhelming. I wonder If we will one-day reincarnate any lifetime we desire digitally! (Easy way to operate Karmic justice without going through the birth cannel!)
I have a VODAFONE here in NZ. I call the United States every week. My parents, siblings and any business matter that needs sudden attention I take care of via E mails or Cell PHONE! I very well remember the hand written letters or detached voice delays in over seas long distance calls...and the cost of a LD phone call!
I know the world is "falling apart" BUT because of technology we have access to knowledge and truth like we have never known. We have satellites that take pictures of the earth's evolvement every second. One can argue global warming, the demise of the rain forests and tides, storms, and holes in the ozone till they are blue in the face, THE PROOF is in the pictures and data we record from outer space. The internet is almost beyond my mind's ability to comprehend at times. I can down load music, sheet music and send my music to anyone that wants it!
I like living in 2006 just fine. Wars, famine, rotten politics, bigots, religious dogmas, ignorance have always been around and will probably always be around, but the knowledge one has at their fingertips is a healing balm and gift from minds that paid big prices to make our current lives FABULOUS BABY!
One thing that depresses me is the money and technology spent on weapons of mass destruction and billions spent on air, sea and land transportation so Bush and his crusade can use them to make the world a safer place. If we used all the nuclear sources sitting inside thousands of missile heads to make fission power we would never worry about the loss of oil resources for thousands of years. ALAS! At least I can talk about it on this blog site!
Technology will not kill us, the lack of it and stupidity will. Cherio.
Friday, March 31, 2006
APRIL FOOLS???
Preludes & Fugues
Who in the hell INVENTED APRIL FOOLS? Doesn't really matter. Would be a nice thing to have Washington DC tell us that IRAQ was only an April Fool's JOKE!
OR that so many of the PROBLEMS in the world of 2006 are just another April Fool's JOKE.
But, I fear that is not the case! ONE THING IS FOR SURE, most of the problems we are dealing with are "man made" out of a democratic, capitalistic, gone insane world of politics, dogmas and hate for each other!
Many times I have thought we are only an "EXTRA TERRESTRIAL" experiment. We are honestly not made for living on planet earth. Our skin, this 'space suit' we live in, is too thin, our immune systems cannot handle the many viruses and diseases, our emotions and chemical balances are not made for the environment we live in. YET, so many of the environmental and physical problems we are dealing with are created by non other than the society of human beings we have become. However, I still find life is full of wonder and beauty and regardless of all the demons of evil and destruction, people are falling in love, enjoying healthy food, traveling, aware of more knowledge and truth than ever in the history of the world and most all I am at a place in my life where I sense a quiet, patient state of peace. (There used to be a undefinable emotion of anger and fear percolating secretly within everything I thought regarding politics, religion and institutions.) This peace of mind I refer to comes with knowing you have survived ever so many impossible events and situations in your life. Just gotta live long enough to acknowledge the fact!
Read this quote this morning in the news:
"Senator when you took your oath of office you placed your hand on the Bible and swore to uphold the CONSTITUTION. You didn't place your hand on the CONSTITUTION and swear to uphold the BIBLE!"
Maryland state Senator candidate James Raskin, testifying March 1, 2006 at a legislative hearing on a proposed marriage discrimination amendment, answering State Senator Nancy Jacob's question about whether "God's Law" forbids "Same-sex Marriage.
Most marriages are a "FARCE" in that they end up in divorce and do prove WORDS that are made into VOWS and COVENANTS do not hold any divine power! I have family members and friends that have been divorced three and more times and have made children by each union, so what is the problem with POLYGAMY? Hell, they have had children by many different wives and women, yet hate polygamy and refuse to live by the power of LOVE and ATTRACTION without a marriage certificate even after that damned certificate has cost them dearly in every way.
God, I do love to rant about this MARRIAGE thing because of my Mormon upbringing, we were taught not to discuss POLYGAMY, and yet the first five prophets of the church and the FOUNDER were all big time multiple partner men. I know! there should be a law that all marriages must be performed on APRIL FOOLS DAY! YES! That way there are no divorces and ugly dramas cause there was not really a binding contract called MIRAGE oops, Marriage!
(I wouldn't be here without a few of those dogmatic Polygamists!)
Just remember: Catch a falling star and put it in your pocket, save it for a rainy day!
Who in the hell INVENTED APRIL FOOLS? Doesn't really matter. Would be a nice thing to have Washington DC tell us that IRAQ was only an April Fool's JOKE!
OR that so many of the PROBLEMS in the world of 2006 are just another April Fool's JOKE.
But, I fear that is not the case! ONE THING IS FOR SURE, most of the problems we are dealing with are "man made" out of a democratic, capitalistic, gone insane world of politics, dogmas and hate for each other!
Many times I have thought we are only an "EXTRA TERRESTRIAL" experiment. We are honestly not made for living on planet earth. Our skin, this 'space suit' we live in, is too thin, our immune systems cannot handle the many viruses and diseases, our emotions and chemical balances are not made for the environment we live in. YET, so many of the environmental and physical problems we are dealing with are created by non other than the society of human beings we have become. However, I still find life is full of wonder and beauty and regardless of all the demons of evil and destruction, people are falling in love, enjoying healthy food, traveling, aware of more knowledge and truth than ever in the history of the world and most all I am at a place in my life where I sense a quiet, patient state of peace. (There used to be a undefinable emotion of anger and fear percolating secretly within everything I thought regarding politics, religion and institutions.) This peace of mind I refer to comes with knowing you have survived ever so many impossible events and situations in your life. Just gotta live long enough to acknowledge the fact!
Read this quote this morning in the news:
"Senator when you took your oath of office you placed your hand on the Bible and swore to uphold the CONSTITUTION. You didn't place your hand on the CONSTITUTION and swear to uphold the BIBLE!"
Maryland state Senator candidate James Raskin, testifying March 1, 2006 at a legislative hearing on a proposed marriage discrimination amendment, answering State Senator Nancy Jacob's question about whether "God's Law" forbids "Same-sex Marriage.
Most marriages are a "FARCE" in that they end up in divorce and do prove WORDS that are made into VOWS and COVENANTS do not hold any divine power! I have family members and friends that have been divorced three and more times and have made children by each union, so what is the problem with POLYGAMY? Hell, they have had children by many different wives and women, yet hate polygamy and refuse to live by the power of LOVE and ATTRACTION without a marriage certificate even after that damned certificate has cost them dearly in every way.
God, I do love to rant about this MARRIAGE thing because of my Mormon upbringing, we were taught not to discuss POLYGAMY, and yet the first five prophets of the church and the FOUNDER were all big time multiple partner men. I know! there should be a law that all marriages must be performed on APRIL FOOLS DAY! YES! That way there are no divorces and ugly dramas cause there was not really a binding contract called MIRAGE oops, Marriage!
(I wouldn't be here without a few of those dogmatic Polygamists!)
Just remember: Catch a falling star and put it in your pocket, save it for a rainy day!
Tuesday, March 28, 2006
Opening the Chakras...
Preludes & Fugues
My dreams did not reveal any earth shaking knowledge regarding why I have a sever blockage in the throat chakra and the sacral chakra. I meditated on it at great length and bits of a "nightmare collage" began shaping within my heart and mind.
I was bullied unmercifully as a child. Grade school was not a joy, it was a dreaded event every day of the school year I was constantly looking out for my physical safety. Waiting for the school bus was a bad enough ordeal trying to avoid a bully named Jimmy Todd. He would rub hard on your skin until you suffered a flesh burn. In the third grade I was beat up by two boys in my class, Keith Cox and Brent Poll. Both know what they did to me. I had never had the wind knocked out of my guts until then. My stomach was beaten black and blue. I avoided them both everyday of my entire school experience, even through high school.
Boy Scouts was even worse. Older boys punching me, calling me a sissy and some actually harming me. They were fat, ugly guys, James Summers, Rudy Fuit, and a few others. Forever, tripping, hitting, slugging, pinching, saying horrible things in my ears and slugging me in the guts and head.
One Easter, my mother made my favorite sandwiches, which were tuna fish, chips and cookies and colored easter eggs for a Easter Picnic with Donny Child who lived on a farm about half a mile from our house. This bully, stomped my box lunch into the ground then picked it up and threw it in the irrigation ditch. I COULD NOT FIGHT BACK! I DID NOT KNOW HOW TO BEAT A PERSON UP.
By the time I was in High School my music was my "life raft" amid a million things that were driving me crazy. By then I had isolated myself from most of my classmates, except for the necessary social events that one must do to graduate. Then came a draft notice. The story goes on, but the point I am trying to make is: I HAVE BLOCKED AND HELD THE PAIN OF THOSE FIRST 12 years of my LIFE SO DEEPLY INSIDE EVERY CELL OF MY PHYSICAL AND SPIRITUAL BEING THAT IT IS NOW all these years later able to be let go of and hopefully peace, health, love and light will fill the void releasing them will create. Of course the SACREL was blocked. It is a most sacred chakra and the throat, I COULD NOT SPEAK out loud about any of this to anyone for so many many many years. The tightness in my pelvic and neck areas is already relaxed as I write. Wheeee, what a healing blog for me!
I FORGIVE ALL OF YOU BULLIES for the hateful things you have done to my life, but I achieved many things because of your actions and I have STEPPED UP to the situation when ever I have witnessed a child being bullied or made fun of. The saddest part of this is, the years I felt inferior, insecure and afraid which are all very negative energy and because of the childhood bulling I did not do well in school and did not achieve all that I could have musically. I felt UNWORTHY and NOT AS GOOD AS OTHER MEN!
To every person whose name I have written within this blog and to those whose names I cannot recall I BELIEVE IN KARMA WITH ALL OF MY HEART AND I KNOW YOU HAVE HAD YOUR KARMIC WHEELS SPINNING THE PAST 53 YEARS. I don't want you in my life any longer.
I know some of you are dead. Some of you are not dead. I was dead for years thanks to you. I now live free of your fear and hate because I know I was a mirror of what you really saw and hated within your own selves. I forgive.
My dreams did not reveal any earth shaking knowledge regarding why I have a sever blockage in the throat chakra and the sacral chakra. I meditated on it at great length and bits of a "nightmare collage" began shaping within my heart and mind.
I was bullied unmercifully as a child. Grade school was not a joy, it was a dreaded event every day of the school year I was constantly looking out for my physical safety. Waiting for the school bus was a bad enough ordeal trying to avoid a bully named Jimmy Todd. He would rub hard on your skin until you suffered a flesh burn. In the third grade I was beat up by two boys in my class, Keith Cox and Brent Poll. Both know what they did to me. I had never had the wind knocked out of my guts until then. My stomach was beaten black and blue. I avoided them both everyday of my entire school experience, even through high school.
Boy Scouts was even worse. Older boys punching me, calling me a sissy and some actually harming me. They were fat, ugly guys, James Summers, Rudy Fuit, and a few others. Forever, tripping, hitting, slugging, pinching, saying horrible things in my ears and slugging me in the guts and head.
One Easter, my mother made my favorite sandwiches, which were tuna fish, chips and cookies and colored easter eggs for a Easter Picnic with Donny Child who lived on a farm about half a mile from our house. This bully, stomped my box lunch into the ground then picked it up and threw it in the irrigation ditch. I COULD NOT FIGHT BACK! I DID NOT KNOW HOW TO BEAT A PERSON UP.
By the time I was in High School my music was my "life raft" amid a million things that were driving me crazy. By then I had isolated myself from most of my classmates, except for the necessary social events that one must do to graduate. Then came a draft notice. The story goes on, but the point I am trying to make is: I HAVE BLOCKED AND HELD THE PAIN OF THOSE FIRST 12 years of my LIFE SO DEEPLY INSIDE EVERY CELL OF MY PHYSICAL AND SPIRITUAL BEING THAT IT IS NOW all these years later able to be let go of and hopefully peace, health, love and light will fill the void releasing them will create. Of course the SACREL was blocked. It is a most sacred chakra and the throat, I COULD NOT SPEAK out loud about any of this to anyone for so many many many years. The tightness in my pelvic and neck areas is already relaxed as I write. Wheeee, what a healing blog for me!
I FORGIVE ALL OF YOU BULLIES for the hateful things you have done to my life, but I achieved many things because of your actions and I have STEPPED UP to the situation when ever I have witnessed a child being bullied or made fun of. The saddest part of this is, the years I felt inferior, insecure and afraid which are all very negative energy and because of the childhood bulling I did not do well in school and did not achieve all that I could have musically. I felt UNWORTHY and NOT AS GOOD AS OTHER MEN!
To every person whose name I have written within this blog and to those whose names I cannot recall I BELIEVE IN KARMA WITH ALL OF MY HEART AND I KNOW YOU HAVE HAD YOUR KARMIC WHEELS SPINNING THE PAST 53 YEARS. I don't want you in my life any longer.
I know some of you are dead. Some of you are not dead. I was dead for years thanks to you. I now live free of your fear and hate because I know I was a mirror of what you really saw and hated within your own selves. I forgive.
Monday, March 27, 2006
My session in Reflexology today
Preludes & Fugues
MY SESSION WITH REFLEXOLOGY TODAY was amazing, alarming and yet so comforting. I love my therapist. Anna is a truly beautiful being and has such healing hands. Her work area is a very sacred space. Everything is perfect. The music, lighting and the table is very comfortable.
I am totally relaxed and "into it" when Anna says,
"Have you been sad? I sense an overwhelming sadness and there is a presence in this room for the second time..."
I have been very depressed the past few days. Not clinically suicidal but not full of energy and joy. I told her that yes, I had been down his week. She asked, If I had any relationship issues that needed to be forgiven and then out of the blue said,
"Have you ever known anyone that died of AIDS?"
OMG, my head was spinning, my heart began to race and I opened up and told her things I have never ever revealed to another person.
Such as: My HONEST OPINION of just what the AIDS epidemic is and YES, the anger and frustration I have denied over many years regarding the needless deaths of some brilliant, talented, loving men that have had and still do have a great influence on my life.
As we talked and she worked my trigger points, many things seemed to dissolve into an open space where freedom and love were the most important emotions.
At the end of the session I felt "comfortable" with a lot of issues.
Tonight I have asked myself over and over WHO? WHAT? WHEN? WHERE? what IS this feeling of morose sadness I have been carrying inside my heart the past few days... TONIGHT MY DREAMS WILL REVEAL IT TO ME. Better check in tomorrow for the rest of the tale. I am a Scorpio and the Sting is in the Tale!
MY SESSION WITH REFLEXOLOGY TODAY was amazing, alarming and yet so comforting. I love my therapist. Anna is a truly beautiful being and has such healing hands. Her work area is a very sacred space. Everything is perfect. The music, lighting and the table is very comfortable.
I am totally relaxed and "into it" when Anna says,
"Have you been sad? I sense an overwhelming sadness and there is a presence in this room for the second time..."
I have been very depressed the past few days. Not clinically suicidal but not full of energy and joy. I told her that yes, I had been down his week. She asked, If I had any relationship issues that needed to be forgiven and then out of the blue said,
"Have you ever known anyone that died of AIDS?"
OMG, my head was spinning, my heart began to race and I opened up and told her things I have never ever revealed to another person.
Such as: My HONEST OPINION of just what the AIDS epidemic is and YES, the anger and frustration I have denied over many years regarding the needless deaths of some brilliant, talented, loving men that have had and still do have a great influence on my life.
As we talked and she worked my trigger points, many things seemed to dissolve into an open space where freedom and love were the most important emotions.
At the end of the session I felt "comfortable" with a lot of issues.
Tonight I have asked myself over and over WHO? WHAT? WHEN? WHERE? what IS this feeling of morose sadness I have been carrying inside my heart the past few days... TONIGHT MY DREAMS WILL REVEAL IT TO ME. Better check in tomorrow for the rest of the tale. I am a Scorpio and the Sting is in the Tale!
Friday, March 24, 2006
Preludes & Fugues
Preludes & Fugues
DEBUSSY ALWAYS ON MY MIND...
When I was a little boy my parents purchased a child's record player. By today's standards it was "PRE-WHEEL" in sound quality but the human ear has the ability to FILL IN THE BLANKS at times. So, to a 6 year old boy that loved music, the sounds were celestial offerings, pure magic!
Two pieces that simply stunned me were: REVERIE and CLAIR DE LUNE by Debussy. From a 6 year old to a now almost 60 year old I still thrill and love the sensuous melodies, harmony and musical architecture of these two piano solos.
I have a well worn Durand & Co. edition of the PRELUDES I purchased in 1962! I've scribbled my name on the front page and from the penmanship I am a different man now than I was at 15! The pages are fragile and brown like toast as I tenderly turn the pages and see wild circles around passages, notes with check marks above them, small "mental notes" scribbled over measures that were reminders of HOW to PLAY this phrase...fingerings and dynamic markings.
Debussy did not give formal titles to each Prelude He wrote the "IDEA or IMPRESSION" in parenthesis at the end of the piece. (..."Les sons et les parfums tournent dans l'air du soir") and (...La Cathedrale engloutie) Twelve haunting miniature paintings using every key on the piano as if it were a pallet of colors in a paint box. A quote from Debussy: " MUSIC IS THE EXPRESSION OF THE MOVEMENT OF WATERS, THE PLAY OF CURVES DESCRIBED BY CHANGING BREEZES. HE WHO FEELS WHAT HE SEES WILL FIND NO MORE BEAUTIFUL EXAMPLE OF DEVELOPMENT IN THE BOOK WHICH, ALAS, MUSICIANS READ BUT TOO LITTLE: THE BOOK OF NATURE..."
The French have an expression: laisser l'esprit vaguer...meaning: To let the spirit wander...
Since 1986 I have made a journey to NYC to study with a master teacher of piano. Such a glorious event for me. Because of my work in the summer I do not have the time to practice two and three hours a day, but never the less the knowledge and lessons I learn from every breath I take on these trips is worthy of a great essay in the adventure or one's pursuit in expanding talents and dreams. I was working on a lecture/recital a couple of years ago and in cleaning my music cabinet came across some notes Carol Montparker had made for me during my time with her and in her wonderful home/studio in Huntington NY.
THE REVERIE: "This belongs to you! It is yours! Touchingly beautiful!"
GOD, what a blessing on my musical head! (some of the rest of these notes are rather severe, like: FIRST BAR!!!! MONITOR YOURSELF TO AVOID EVER SOUNDING HARSH OR STRIDENT, Even if "fff" bars are marked..." Carol is a genius when it comes to "touching" the inner musician in all of us.
I must play this program right now. Every time I play the Preludes I discover new and touching pathos of emotion and light.
Carol site is: www://montparker.com/ Or do a google search. I'm spending the evening at the keyboard with Debussy.
DEBUSSY ALWAYS ON MY MIND...
When I was a little boy my parents purchased a child's record player. By today's standards it was "PRE-WHEEL" in sound quality but the human ear has the ability to FILL IN THE BLANKS at times. So, to a 6 year old boy that loved music, the sounds were celestial offerings, pure magic!
Two pieces that simply stunned me were: REVERIE and CLAIR DE LUNE by Debussy. From a 6 year old to a now almost 60 year old I still thrill and love the sensuous melodies, harmony and musical architecture of these two piano solos.
I have a well worn Durand & Co. edition of the PRELUDES I purchased in 1962! I've scribbled my name on the front page and from the penmanship I am a different man now than I was at 15! The pages are fragile and brown like toast as I tenderly turn the pages and see wild circles around passages, notes with check marks above them, small "mental notes" scribbled over measures that were reminders of HOW to PLAY this phrase...fingerings and dynamic markings.
Debussy did not give formal titles to each Prelude He wrote the "IDEA or IMPRESSION" in parenthesis at the end of the piece. (..."Les sons et les parfums tournent dans l'air du soir") and (...La Cathedrale engloutie) Twelve haunting miniature paintings using every key on the piano as if it were a pallet of colors in a paint box. A quote from Debussy: " MUSIC IS THE EXPRESSION OF THE MOVEMENT OF WATERS, THE PLAY OF CURVES DESCRIBED BY CHANGING BREEZES. HE WHO FEELS WHAT HE SEES WILL FIND NO MORE BEAUTIFUL EXAMPLE OF DEVELOPMENT IN THE BOOK WHICH, ALAS, MUSICIANS READ BUT TOO LITTLE: THE BOOK OF NATURE..."
The French have an expression: laisser l'esprit vaguer...meaning: To let the spirit wander...
Since 1986 I have made a journey to NYC to study with a master teacher of piano. Such a glorious event for me. Because of my work in the summer I do not have the time to practice two and three hours a day, but never the less the knowledge and lessons I learn from every breath I take on these trips is worthy of a great essay in the adventure or one's pursuit in expanding talents and dreams. I was working on a lecture/recital a couple of years ago and in cleaning my music cabinet came across some notes Carol Montparker had made for me during my time with her and in her wonderful home/studio in Huntington NY.
THE REVERIE: "This belongs to you! It is yours! Touchingly beautiful!"
GOD, what a blessing on my musical head! (some of the rest of these notes are rather severe, like: FIRST BAR!!!! MONITOR YOURSELF TO AVOID EVER SOUNDING HARSH OR STRIDENT, Even if "fff" bars are marked..." Carol is a genius when it comes to "touching" the inner musician in all of us.
I must play this program right now. Every time I play the Preludes I discover new and touching pathos of emotion and light.
Carol site is: www://montparker.com/ Or do a google search. I'm spending the evening at the keyboard with Debussy.
Thursday, March 23, 2006
Preludes & Fugues
Preludes & Fugues
DOES JESUS LOVE ONLY RED STATES?
I do wonder what these people in "RED STATES" must really think when it comes to the storms that have targeted their areas and killed many innocent people? I would think that God and Jesus would have drawn a 'orb of protection' around these states and the people that live and support the war in Iraq as well as every thing the GOP says and does. BUT APPARENTLY NOT SO! The French Quarter of New Orleans was spared and yet it is really where most of the prostitution and "dark sided" axis of evil, exist. These storms do not segregate those that are "saved" from their sins from those that are child molesters to out right murderers. Florida has been hit by some really horrible storms, and the mid west...hummmmm? Could it be JESUS IS TELLING THESE JERRY FAWELLS and PAT ROBERTSON followers a thing or two? Like possibly these states have made God and Jesus very UNHAPPY! Huh?!@#$E*%R!
I don't understand why the GOP didn't buy Iraq, like purchasing a piece of Real Estate and then Halliburton would have access to all it's oil and I am sure something could have been arranged with Saddam so that he could remain in power, keep a balance within the region and make even more money than he already had. Plus the kick backs would have been phenomenal. BUT, then the guys that make money manufacturing utensils for war, rockets, guns, humvees they might not get the promises made to them for campaign donations.
In my life time I have endured some horrible Administrations. LBJ! Now, what the fuck was that all about? Nixon was insane, and then the FORDS! OMG, that was free entertainment every day and night. Viet Nam was a nightmare, then the WAR ON POVERTY, THE WAR ON DRUGS, THE WARS AGAINST anything that distracted the minds of most Americans as to what was really going on in Washington D.C. Did heterosexuals actually BELIEVE, especially after they have accepted Jesus Christ as their personal savior, the GAYS would destroy the SANCTITY OF MARRIAGE????? Bill Clinton's blow job was worse than killing innocent children in the attack in Iraq? Christians amaze me. A few years ago I had a very religious friend tell me she could not eat in my restaurant because alcohol was sold. WHAT? I would think that with all the protection of the Holy Ghost and God's shield of love and protection from Satan, these people could walk through any fearful situation unscathed! NOT SO! Seems some of them want to kill and live in fear of everything that breathes for fear it may destroy their testimony and faith in what? They kill because they really want to kill the dogmas they blindly believe in. A jealous GOD? A God that had Abraham offer his only son as a sacrifice to prove Abraham's love to GOD!!! True Christians would have "turned the other cheek" and openly forgave the Saudis and Afghanis that attack the WTC. Alas!
Dear God, I feel good. Love and light! B.
DOES JESUS LOVE ONLY RED STATES?
I do wonder what these people in "RED STATES" must really think when it comes to the storms that have targeted their areas and killed many innocent people? I would think that God and Jesus would have drawn a 'orb of protection' around these states and the people that live and support the war in Iraq as well as every thing the GOP says and does. BUT APPARENTLY NOT SO! The French Quarter of New Orleans was spared and yet it is really where most of the prostitution and "dark sided" axis of evil, exist. These storms do not segregate those that are "saved" from their sins from those that are child molesters to out right murderers. Florida has been hit by some really horrible storms, and the mid west...hummmmm? Could it be JESUS IS TELLING THESE JERRY FAWELLS and PAT ROBERTSON followers a thing or two? Like possibly these states have made God and Jesus very UNHAPPY! Huh?!@#$E*%R!
I don't understand why the GOP didn't buy Iraq, like purchasing a piece of Real Estate and then Halliburton would have access to all it's oil and I am sure something could have been arranged with Saddam so that he could remain in power, keep a balance within the region and make even more money than he already had. Plus the kick backs would have been phenomenal. BUT, then the guys that make money manufacturing utensils for war, rockets, guns, humvees they might not get the promises made to them for campaign donations.
In my life time I have endured some horrible Administrations. LBJ! Now, what the fuck was that all about? Nixon was insane, and then the FORDS! OMG, that was free entertainment every day and night. Viet Nam was a nightmare, then the WAR ON POVERTY, THE WAR ON DRUGS, THE WARS AGAINST anything that distracted the minds of most Americans as to what was really going on in Washington D.C. Did heterosexuals actually BELIEVE, especially after they have accepted Jesus Christ as their personal savior, the GAYS would destroy the SANCTITY OF MARRIAGE????? Bill Clinton's blow job was worse than killing innocent children in the attack in Iraq? Christians amaze me. A few years ago I had a very religious friend tell me she could not eat in my restaurant because alcohol was sold. WHAT? I would think that with all the protection of the Holy Ghost and God's shield of love and protection from Satan, these people could walk through any fearful situation unscathed! NOT SO! Seems some of them want to kill and live in fear of everything that breathes for fear it may destroy their testimony and faith in what? They kill because they really want to kill the dogmas they blindly believe in. A jealous GOD? A God that had Abraham offer his only son as a sacrifice to prove Abraham's love to GOD!!! True Christians would have "turned the other cheek" and openly forgave the Saudis and Afghanis that attack the WTC. Alas!
Dear God, I feel good. Love and light! B.
Tuesday, March 21, 2006
Preludes & Fugues
Preludes & Fugues
THE HEALING HANDS OF REFLEXOLOGY & MASSAGE!
I love being touched. I grew up in a household that believed in the power of "THE
LAYING ON OF HANDS" to heal about everything from a scratch to tumors full of cancer.
My body has been a JOY to live in until I turned 55. All kinds of mysterious things began
surfacing. Arthritis in my hands. YIKES! I am a pianist. Enlargement of the prostate gland.
Bladder infections? Sinus blockage? VISION CHANGED to blur when reading and things
began showing up on my skin...lines, spots, bumps, dry patches and hair sprouting
in places I NEVER HAD HAIR!
I've worked my way around a lot of this "late-mid-life-drama" but recently discovered some-
things that has literally changed my life: REFLEXOLOGY. This was better than paying some
fortune teller to tell and read my future. As Anna massaged and pressed on my feet she
asked questions like, "your blocked in your prostate area." okay..... "Your sinus are blocked."
Okay..... "Your right leg bothers you, the knee." Well, this goes on and I am moaning and
grunting out acknowledgments of how right she is. Well, 4 sessions later and my pelvic
area is not in pain. Bladder is functioning perfectly and the sinus are cleared. IF nothing
else works this magic touch does.
I also believe in the healing powers of massage. I have a wonderful masseuse. She can find
trigger points faster than lightening and then apply just the right pressure as to OPEN the
KNOT that binds. I discovered a great massage therapist a couple of years ago in Boise Idaho
when I was performing a concert and master class. He introduced me to the THERA CANE.
Massage and Reflexology go hand in hand, (no pun intended.) but there is one thing I've
learned about reflexology, take time after a session to "ground" yourself. I am often out
there with the fairies for about an hour after treatment. (I actually have spent a lot of my
life out there with the the fairies!)
The clouds have drawn a gray curtain across the mountains and tiny crystals of water are
floating in the air outside. signs of winter everywhere. Meaning SPRING TIME IN THE
ROCKIES! Good day for drinking strong coffee and reading that book I just can't seem to
get into. Cherio.
THE HEALING HANDS OF REFLEXOLOGY & MASSAGE!
I love being touched. I grew up in a household that believed in the power of "THE
LAYING ON OF HANDS" to heal about everything from a scratch to tumors full of cancer.
My body has been a JOY to live in until I turned 55. All kinds of mysterious things began
surfacing. Arthritis in my hands. YIKES! I am a pianist. Enlargement of the prostate gland.
Bladder infections? Sinus blockage? VISION CHANGED to blur when reading and things
began showing up on my skin...lines, spots, bumps, dry patches and hair sprouting
in places I NEVER HAD HAIR!
I've worked my way around a lot of this "late-mid-life-drama" but recently discovered some-
things that has literally changed my life: REFLEXOLOGY. This was better than paying some
fortune teller to tell and read my future. As Anna massaged and pressed on my feet she
asked questions like, "your blocked in your prostate area." okay..... "Your sinus are blocked."
Okay..... "Your right leg bothers you, the knee." Well, this goes on and I am moaning and
grunting out acknowledgments of how right she is. Well, 4 sessions later and my pelvic
area is not in pain. Bladder is functioning perfectly and the sinus are cleared. IF nothing
else works this magic touch does.
I also believe in the healing powers of massage. I have a wonderful masseuse. She can find
trigger points faster than lightening and then apply just the right pressure as to OPEN the
KNOT that binds. I discovered a great massage therapist a couple of years ago in Boise Idaho
when I was performing a concert and master class. He introduced me to the THERA CANE.
Massage and Reflexology go hand in hand, (no pun intended.) but there is one thing I've
learned about reflexology, take time after a session to "ground" yourself. I am often out
there with the fairies for about an hour after treatment. (I actually have spent a lot of my
life out there with the the fairies!)
The clouds have drawn a gray curtain across the mountains and tiny crystals of water are
floating in the air outside. signs of winter everywhere. Meaning SPRING TIME IN THE
ROCKIES! Good day for drinking strong coffee and reading that book I just can't seem to
get into. Cherio.
From New Zealand
I am a blest man. Live, play and work 8 months a year in the heart of the Rocky Mountains. Live and play 4 months a year in the Southern Hemisphere, Queenstown, New Zealand. Been coming to New Zealand for 16 years. next year will be 17 years!
Have watched New Zealand evolve from a very small socialistic country into a very capitalistic open society and I must say I like it very much. My great great grandfather came to New Zealand on a Mormon Mission before 1900!!!! God, possibly I have relatives all over the place, after all Mormon's did practice POLYGAMY and the Maori women and men are attractive people. From my piano studio window I see a view that rivals any view on this planet! Lake Wakitipu and the majestic mountains that surround its shores. Lord of the Rings was filmed here.
I arrive in country on January 28 and leave April 28 of each year. Each year I set goals that I hope to achieve during my time of bliss and self-discovery here in NZ. I have almost 6 weeks left to loose some of the "muffin top" around my stomach, finish composing two new songs and polish two Beethoven Sonatas for performance as well as finish reading about 20 new books I had sent down!
I must step outside and throw a kiss to the moon and stars before I head to bed. One thing that is a marvelous gift from "down under" is the SOUTHERN CROSS! We cannot see it in the northern heavens!
Love and Light, Brenthoven
Have watched New Zealand evolve from a very small socialistic country into a very capitalistic open society and I must say I like it very much. My great great grandfather came to New Zealand on a Mormon Mission before 1900!!!! God, possibly I have relatives all over the place, after all Mormon's did practice POLYGAMY and the Maori women and men are attractive people. From my piano studio window I see a view that rivals any view on this planet! Lake Wakitipu and the majestic mountains that surround its shores. Lord of the Rings was filmed here.
I arrive in country on January 28 and leave April 28 of each year. Each year I set goals that I hope to achieve during my time of bliss and self-discovery here in NZ. I have almost 6 weeks left to loose some of the "muffin top" around my stomach, finish composing two new songs and polish two Beethoven Sonatas for performance as well as finish reading about 20 new books I had sent down!
I must step outside and throw a kiss to the moon and stars before I head to bed. One thing that is a marvelous gift from "down under" is the SOUTHERN CROSS! We cannot see it in the northern heavens!
Love and Light, Brenthoven
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